The Hang Up Ringer

The Hang Up “Ringer”

-So we are all familiar with the emergence of the unique ring tone. You call your friend and are treated to the latest single from Gwen Stefani or the gifted musician T-Pain (world’s most sarcastic comment). Gone is good old standby: ring….ring…ring…, replaced by “If I could be free…you know I’d be a real bad giiirrlll”. My idea: the Hang Up ringer!

Why do we need this you may be asking….well, let me elaborate. Back in “the day”, when you got PO’d at someone on the phone, you could take the handset and violently SLAM it down to hang up on them, and the idiot on the other end would have to pull the phone away from their ear to avoid having their ear drum burst (which they probably deserved). Now though, will these darn cell phones, all you can do is push end…unable to convey your anger, thereby allowing the other person to get away with their phone rudeness! In fact, they will often have no clue they have been hung up on and continue in their rudeness with no audience! Psh…punks!

Well, no more. What if every time you pushed END, the sound of a loud flushing toilet signaled the end of the call to the person on the other end? Whooo….sssssshhhhh!!! Yup, you’ve just been flushed like a piece of you know what!!! You could go anywhere with this idea. There could be different catagories: bathroom sounds (all KINDS of opportunity here), gangsta sign offs (“WHADJU SAY??? I’m comin over there!” or simply the sound of a gunshot), sports (an umpire screaming “Yeeerrr OUTTA HERE!!!”) and even songs (“Na na na…na na na…hey hey hey…goodbye” – I could sing it and be as famous as that operator lady!). You could even go old school and have it be a recording of someone loudly slamming a handset!!! How in your face would that be. The person hears the slam, and says to themselves “But he was on his cell phone!?!?!” and is confused for the remainder of the day.

The possibilities are endless! Suffice it to say, people would probably start calling people just to hang up on them. Prank calls would be a whole new ballgame. And in the off chance that you really can’t stand when someone calls you, you could make the hang up ringer be the regular ringer whenever they call! Every time they CALL they hear a man ask “Why are you calling me. I can’t stand you…don’t even leave a message, cuz I am not calling you back…EVER!”

***I ALREADY CALLED THE US PATENT OFFICE, so don’t even try it!!!***